Friday, September 14, 2012

I'm a Smoothie Operator


I gave up on my old Oster Blender because I had to play the buttons like piano keys to get it to stop blending.   I don't play the piano,  so my lack of talent resulted in a bevy of blended blobs all over my kitchen.

Which is what lead me to this muscular beauty.  I usually prefer my kitchen appliances be weak and submissive but I was assured by many healthy people, that only a 800 horsepower blender could grind up the ingredients necessary to a create a green smoothie powerful enough to help me bench press 200 lbs. and give me 20/20 eyesight with night vision capabilities.

It has changed my life.

As promised, this mini wood chipper has the ability to grind up a small mammal without deboning. 

I started out by blending up breakfast shakes, and then progressed to lunch smoothies and now we are pretty much drinking all our meals.

Husband:  Hey, what do you have in mind for dinner tonight?

Me:  I thought we would have steaks.

Husband (brightening)  With baked potatoes?

Me:  Mmmm hmmm.  And green beans.

Husband:  That sounds so good, I was really getting tired of smoothies.

Me:  Not so fast sweetie, (pouring a thick brown amalgam into a quart mason jar).  I call this the "Bottomless Black Angus" and you're going to need a fat straw.

I still can't see in the dark, 
but give me a week or two.

 

13 comments:

Anne said...

Haha this is awesome. Glad you love your new toy, I hear they are incredible and can't wait to get one to decorate my counter and improve out night vision (haha!)

Anna M said...

I wish I wasn't so attached to my Vitamix, but it could very well be my favorite thing in the kitchen... aside from the ice maker built into the freezer (have you heard of those? genius)!

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

Haha...my husband feels that way about soup, which is my go-to meal. My fave kitchen gadget is my hand blender which is perfect for only making 1-2 smoothies. Also good for de-lumping gravy right in the pan. :)

Robyn said...

LOL! Your'e too much.. You got a Vitamix! Ive heard nothing but good things about them.. Enjoy it! :)
Robyn

Laurel said...

Ewwwwwe! Poor hubby! He needs something he can chew.

Sue said...

haha

I have one, too, and I love it. My hubby? Not so much.

;)

Sue said...

PS. And when I say "not so much," I am referring to Dave's feeling for the blender. Not mine for him.

heehee

Tricia J. O'Brien said...

hahahaha! I had a blender that required a little ragtime to work, but I'm not sure I'm ready for steak shakes.

karen said...

I used to have a Vitamix - got it at the Orange County Fair thirty years ago. It lasted about 20 years and then the motor gave out - it was awesome. I used to make my own peanut butter.

Connie said...

Uh Oh, nothing is safe in your refrigerator anymore. I can't wait for the "Larainy's Ultra Gormet Smoothie Cook Book" to come out followed by the "Thanksgiving in a Smoothie" cook book too. Yum! I can't wait.

Oregon Gifts of Comfort and Joy said...

That is one good lookin' mean machine! I laughed when you said why you finally got a new one. I still have my old one, the keys stick and I have to use a salad plate for the lid, but dang that thing still works.

Thanks so much for stopping by to visit the other day.

Kathy M.

Pondside said...

This makes me think that it's time to drag the old blender out from under the counter and dust it off. I'm thinking Leftover Lamb and Squash smoothies for tomorrow's dinner......

MTeacress said...

My husband collects blenders. Maybe I can borrow yours with which to blend his. :P