First Day of School at My House

For the first time in 25 years, this is my back to school picture.

In the first years, gap-toothed kids beamed with excitement, and for the last few years, grudging teenagers have paused and given a "c'mon Mom, hurry up" smile at the front door.  But this year, no one was rushing off wearing carefully chosen first day of school clothes.

I remember crying when I sent off our first daughter to kindergarten at Show Low Elementary.  Little did I know that it was just the beginning of all the letting go I would have to do.  No one properly warns you of these things when you are a new mom.  There should be a cautionary tattoo on your sweet new baby that says:

WARNING!!!

This child will grow up if you are lucky, 

and then will leave you if you are lucky,

and still, you will probably cry about it

There are some things I definitely will not miss about having children in school: 

• the hassle of packing nutritious lunches with sandwiches carved into swans nestled in tissue paper and baby carrots wearing little hats made of olives - along with inspirational quotes hand lettered on papyrus
• Daily coordination and encouraging communication with teachers to make sure that my child is getting the best education possible
• Constructing homemade backpacks out of environmentally friendly handwoven linen
•  Latin lessons around the kitchen table

(Okay, so I never did any of that, 

except maybe the occasional olive hat on a baby carrot)

 

Today, I am feeling lucky but not sad

Because the last one is still here until 

she's off to college in September.

 

Girls Rule, Boys Drool

Children all over America's fruited plain are back in school.  Fresh crayons are being unsharpened, new backpacks are being left on the playground, Little Debbies are being wolfed down at lunch and the nutritious peanut butter banana honey sandwich cut in the shape of a star is being tossed in the garbage.  Kids learn so fast!

In a series of searching interviews, I found out what the man/kid/woman on the street has to say about the school experience.

Leonard enjoys watching out for his little brother Bart, 

but Bart knows that Leonard is really the one who needs watching.

Allen couldn't wait for show and tell because 

no one else in kindergarten 

had a Mom with hair that

could conceal a Spiderman lunchbox

This is exactly the sort of picture you can expect 

when the photographer says 

"Saaaaaay Boogie Man that lives under your bed!"

Mom made us all get perms 

to save on blow drying time in the morning.

Sure, we look tough, but Skippy and I

still secretly wear our Winnie the Poo underwear

You may be surprised to know that Dee and I were 

both suspended for having too much school spirit.

Etta Mae and I were the only girls at Field Elementary 

that had to milk three cows before breakfast

all photos can be found on sexy people: here