Lost in the Frost

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Last week Republican presidential candidate Rick Perry suffered a prolonged bout of brain freeze during a nationally televised debate.  His gaffe came very close to being unseen because it was part of the 579th debate held by an exhausted Republican field watched only by an audience who had been promised a frozen turkey and one can of Del Monte creamed corn for tuning in.  But, due to one alert cameraman tanked up with a 44 oz. Dr. Pepper, the moment was recorded and is currently being replayed ad nauseum.  

Perry's brain freeze occurred when he tried to come up with a list of three government agencies he was going to cut. 

I hate to be blunt, but hey Rick...duh.

Any search for a list of more than two items through a dusty old-style rolodex type noggin covered with graying hair is never going to end well!

Larainy is sorry for getting technical, but would like to provide to you, dear reader, a scientific explanation of exactly what happened.

Perry's stress induced adrenaline caused crystals to begin forming in the cerebrum's left frontal lobe which spread through the limbic system, in turn icing the 300 million nerve fibers called the corpus callosum, which shut down the dendrites and turned the brain into this

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 ...all in the space of 3 seconds. The drops of moisture on Perry's forehead were not sweat, but melting ice.  It was a classic and highly visible example of glacialis cerebrum or brain freeze.


The President of the United States should be someone inspiring, who makes me feel good about myself, and suddenly, Rick Perry is a very viable candidate.***


***Should not be considered an endorsement.  All major candidates have offered Larainy vast sums of money NOT to endorse them.