Jane Austen is the opposite of the Olympics. You would never see Jane Austen’s girls tucking their little curly heads into helmets and their bosomy highwaisted, flowing dresses into baggy snow suits to hit the half pipe.
None of Jane’s girls would be persuaded to give up all sense and date a flying tomato before they had the sensibility to be properly introduced. Those girls have too much pride to overcome their prejudice against speed skaters with gargantuan thighs that look like permanent jodphurs.
Anyway, back to my really great idea. I am going to start an
ANTISOCIAL NETWORK.
I am going to call it
TWO-FACEBOOK.
I plan to siphon off all the meanies that currently feel so out of place on the “social" networks. I am going to give them a place they will feel comfortable, where they can rant and rave and cuss and say bad things about all their antisocial associates.
On Two-facebook
• You won’t add “friends” you’ll add “enemies”
• Your personal information will be called “Profilers” since all information will be right out of an FBI handbook on abnormal behavior
• All photos will be in black and white
• The home page will be called “The Cellar”
• Lots of fun apps will be available to install viruses
• Find your enemies with the “Search and Destroy” feature
• You won’t “share” you will “inflict”
I’ll keep you posted.
I’ve got to go buy another bag of kettle corn so I can figure out the rest.
5 comments:
You are one funny lady!
=)
you always make my day! How do I get an account with two-facebook?
Sorry Emily, you're not quite mean enough yet. You'll have to work on it.
Or instead of "inflict," you could "infect."
lol! Laraine... i am so glad i found your blog! You are so awesome!
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