Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Resolution Dissolution

The tree is gone and I missed plugging in the lights this morning.  I am always the first one up and lighting up the Christmas tree always makes me feel like Thomas Edison.

The holidays were chock full of family, because we reunioned together in California...the first time we have been all together in ages, and the last time we will be able to for a few years.

So, now it's on to resolutions. 

I have become painfully aware of a deficiency in my character that I have been blind to for many years.  This is something I'm not proud of and only share with you, dear readers, because you have shown yourself to be a kind and nonjudgmental sort.

Here goes.

If, by chance, you happened by for a visit to my home and were obliged to use the "facilities", you would, at some point in performing your ablutions, have reached for the toilet paper roll only to find it, ahem, starkly unadorned.
May I take this opportunity to apologize for my insensitive behavior.  I know I must have offended many a delicate sensibility with the sight of this undisguised utilitarian cleansing tool.

But...the year is new and I have the will to better myself.  I hereby resolve to cover each roll and protect family and friends alike from the unpleasantness of a brashly nude roll of toilet paper.

Options include:
The cupcake; for when your bum is craving something sweet

The scary baby with scissors; for when you want to caution your guests against profligate overuse of the roll


The saucy doll head;
for when your snoopy guests just have to find out what is under that blue hair
The sushi roll, roll cover; for when your body feels the need to replenish and release simultaneously

And for heavens sake, if you can't cover it up, at least do a little folding.

 Here's to resolutions
we can keep!


RoeH said...

LOL! I've got to make my toilet paper prettier. My cat would love it. BTW - I had to kill my All About Arizona blog.

Thanks weird relative!!

I now have a new one all pretty and ready for 2012.


I even named it after Jo's stinky plant.

Yeah - I know. :)

Holly said...

Holy freaking Crap! I'm coming over.

just call me jo said...

I hope I'm never really desperate to get some toilet tissue at your house. I'd be struggling with the shushi, doll head, oragamy stuff. I think you could stay unadorned in my humble opinion. But g'head if that makes you feel better. I wondered about you. Missed your shining presence.

Dem, Mem and Them said...

I like the origami. The sushi is fitting as I think it tastes like the item you are using it to cleanse!

Cherie said...

I am totally telling the truth when I say my grandma had one of those heads in her bathroom while I was growing up. Hers had blond hair and it was stinkin' freaky!!

Your bathroom sounds fun!!

Yayyy for goals and dreams and while we are at it ablutions too (there's a fun word for you!).

Thanks for the laugh :-D

The Bipolar Diva said...

origami! and LOVE the pictures!~

jen said...

Does this mean you're officially old, wanting to hide your TP? Mine will stay naked till I die!

karen said...

What beautiful pictures of your family - you can't fail to have fun in Huntington Beach for the holidays!
And as far as TP goes - I'm going for the origami.

Pondside said...

First, and seriously, you have a beautiful family - 'God bless them', as my mother would remind me to say after issuing such an opinion.
Now, not so seriously, but truthfully, I was once given a blue crocheted cover for the toilet paper and I had to use it for as long as we lived near the person who made it. The first thing I did when we unpacked after a transfer to the new post was ditch that cover!
The origami - I vote for the origami, especially if I've read all your magazines.

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

Awesome family photos! What a beautiful group you are. I won't say I hope you had a great time, because I know you did. How wonderful to have your whole family together.

I used to have a knit thing I put over the toilet paper roll. I used it until my youngest was 2 and decided she wanted it for a hat. I couldn't keep it off her head and finally gave up. LOL

Sue said...


I think I'll just take the naked paper!!


MTeacress said...

You family pics turned out great. I love the beach. We did ours at a bird refuge. :)

The origami tp approach is my favorite. The baby with scissors is not.