THIS IS AN URGENT
WARNING TO MOTHERS
OF YOUNG CHILDREN
Even if you are experiencing a life-threatening urge for
glue sticks, velcro or decorative spanish moss,
do not attempt to take your children shopping with you at this store!!!
Oh sure, you may make it through the fabric cutting line, or negotiate the yarn aisle by cramming your little darling full of goldfish crackers and fruit snacks,
but eventually you will be forced to walk...
"The Chocolate Mile"
on your way to the checkout.
I have seen many a young mother try to make it
past this treacherous stretch without beating their begging child.
There is a reason that Child Protective Services has a kiosk in the lobby.
You decide what is more important;
buying a pack of googly eyes to make that thing you saw on pinterest
watching your little darling grow up in foster care because you lost your cool in the middle of the chocolate mile and pummeled junior with a pool noodle that was on clearance for $3.99
The choice is yours.