Friday, July 16, 2010

Sweet Competition

It has been a rough week at the Candyland Camp: Competitive Division here in the Gumdrop Mountains.  I have been training for the winter finals against some of the top contenders of the Candyland world.

The schedule has been grueling.

6:00 a.m.     Wakeup yoga with Plumpy

8:00 a.m.     Granola and gooey gumdrops with Gramma Nut

9:00 a.m.  Strategy with Lord Licorice

12:00 p.m.  Light lunch with Gloppy                        


1:00 p.m.  Deceptive Body Language training with Lolly

4:00  Jujitsu and throwing stars with Queen Frostine

6:00 p.m.  Dinner with Mr. Mint

7:00 p.m. - 12:00 a.m.  Color recognition training with Jolly

King Kandy is somewhat of a control freak, a real hands on camp director.  He is tough but fair and scholarships are available if you are not able to come up with the tuition, which is pricey.  ($8,900 for a week of intensive training, including room and board - double occupancy).  You will make many new friends, and a few enemies.

Some tips I have learned that will hopefully take me all the way to the 2010 World Finals in Hershey, PA

1.  Forget those namby pamby gingerbread kids.  Get yourself a token that will intimidate the competition.

2.  Slow licking of a lollipop during a game will drive your opponent to distraction, especially if he doesn't have one...a great way to throw him off his game.

3.  Crunching peanut brittle; ditto.

4.  Rainbow Trail and Gumdrop Pass need to be utilized to be effective.  Don't forget these vital elements as you pass the gingerbread plum trees and the licorice castle.

5.  A wily young competitor will pout, eyes will flood with tears and will often threaten to "go tell my mama" but don't be fooled.  All the youngsters care about is winning at all costs.  Don't give in!

6.  Don't be diverted by your opponents burping and farting digressions.  These are techniques routinely practiced by the most experienced Candyland professionals.  Keep your cool.

Wish me luck!


Pondside said...

It sounds as though you are at the top of your game - good luck! As a past World Champion - Cottage Heavyweight Division, I know that the course if grueling, but the rewards are sweet. Persevere!!

Marti said...

LOL, love it. You could use naptime to your advantage too, when your opponent is weakest.

Katie Bell said...

Although I've never won, in any sense of the word, I find using an adorable one year old with great fine motor but no strategy sense is an advantage. She can lure the competition into a false sense of security and takes out said game piece. Plus, she only responds to her 'master'.

Sue said...

Thanks for the strategies. You can be sure I will put them to good use.


Missy said...

Gosh, I am so glad that room and board is included in the week. I would hate to have to figure out a way to bring my own board.

Janet Johnson said...

This is a favorite at our house too right now . . . but I do believe some of those pictures on ours are different. Interesting.

Good luck to you . . . just know we're flexing our muscles for the World Finals here, too. ;)

Anne said...

Love it- too funny!

I can't believe how big the kids are (and Miss Z is so pretty and looks just like Rachael! How fun!)

Leigh Russell said...

Good luck!