Monday, March 28, 2011

Winning Big with the Biggest Losers

Were you disappointed in the proceeds from 
your last fund raising bake sale?

Were you forced to eat 43 lbs. of stale brownies 
because you were too cheap to throw them away?

Was the profit not worth the aggravation?

You silly goose! You forgot this essential element...

LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION

The next time you need to raise some serious cash, find out where 
is holding auditions.  
There you will be a line winding around the block filled with super sized hopefuls 
who need to weigh as much as possible for the tryout.  
Try have heavy baked goods on hand.  Forget cream puffs, lay in some heavy slabs of pie. 

Don't leave too early.  The Biggest Loser losers will pass by your sale again, 
crying their eyes out and in need of 
comfort food when they don't make the cut.

You can't lose!



Larainy, before and after

 

9 comments:

Sue said...

Major props go out to you for your metamorphosis.

(You make us proud.)

;)

Cheeseboy said...

WHY didn't I think of this? Brilliant! And we just had auditions here a month ago. I could have totally stocked up on the Krispy Kremes.

Holly said...

The transformation is truly amazing. Well done my skinny friend. Let's get together and put a few of those pounds back on.

just call me jo said...

A little cruel, Larainy. It's like setting up a free bar outside an AA meeting place. Tsk! Tsk! We're talking people with a DISEASE here. (I know. I fight it every day.) But you look mahvelous, darling. You must be doin' somethin' right.

Darrell said...

Ha Ha! I could have used some of this a few weeks ago when I tried out for Biggest Loser. They told me they liked my personality and that I should try again when I am fatter.

Dawn said...

thank you for the daily chuckle. And seriously who has enough to actually sell when it comes to the bake sell. Nothing lasts more than a late night feeding frenzy in this house!

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

Devious and brilliant. And we wouldn't want you any other way. :)

*lindsey said...

Wow Laraine, you lost so much weight! And so much ... Asian-ness...

Celeste Dana said...

Funny Laraine. We decided the biggest loser auditions would be a wonderful place to advertise for our weight loss company. We passed out hundreds of fliers and talked to tons of people standing in line and didn't get a single call, maybe your idea would have brought us some income.