Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Beware of Couch Pillow Spyware

Curse you Wikileaks!

How could you exploit information obtained via a clever robotic device that infiltrated my home disguised as an innocent couch pillow that moved from room to room without being detected amongst the chaos and detritus of an abundance of family home for Thanksgiving. 

How could you leak embarrassing and incriminating information such as...

 My addiction to eggnog straight from the bottle

 The priceless artistic rendition of a manger scene by two talented grandkids who are 
obviously breaking new ground artistically but at 6 and 3, not ready yet for the adulation of the world

The embarrassing discovery of a cereal bowl in the bathroom

The cobwebs allowed to flourish in corners 
that accent a bad paint job over badly installed drywall.

A stolen secret stash of chocolate chips, 
guarded by a musket and a youngster not afraid to use it.

Wikileaks, my Christmas wish for you is that you eat 2 lbs. of fruitcake prepared 
by the unwashed hands of an unsympathetic friend 
with a communicable digestive disorder .


Sue said...

A fitting end for the leaker(s) of such dastardly details, I believe.


Holly said...

You sure you didn't buy that nativity scene at Pier One? What the ****?? Kids are weird.

Julie Harward said...

That is funny...and I wish the real leakers worse than that! ;D

SherilinR said...

thank God i haven't been infiltrated yet. the shame that would abound...

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

That would be just punishment, indeed. Praise be to God the only "ears" in my walls belong to dust bunnies.

Melynda said...

A cereal bowl! I cracked up for sure.

Pondside said...

I was sure I saw a bug in the ceiling light in the kitchen.
It was a dead fly - but I was ready for the media attention!

Anonymous said...

The hand painted, one-of-a-kind Manger scene is priceless. The colors are so crazy that I could not take my eyes off of it! I hope you set it in the spotlight. What a keeper!

Dem, Mem and Them said...

Time for another intervention, I believe.