A) Accurately filling out the 2010 census, and
B) Taking the “Harry Potter Sorting Hat Quiz” in order to find out which “house” I belong to.
image found here
What this has to do with national security I don’t rightly know, but when Janet speaks, I listen…especially because she sounds like my high school gym teacher, Ms. Greta Fronske, who could bench-press 250 lbs.
image found here
Sadly, the sorting hat quiz revealed that Larainy would not be welcome in the houses of Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw or Slytherin. In fact, I couldn’t make it into Hogwarts even if I paid full tuition.
Larainy is eligible only for a charter school called Verminbridge Prep, founded by Aurelius Verminbridge, a disgraced exotic animal veterinarian that was stripped of his license when he was caught flogging his unicorn using a viper as a riding quirt.
Now I don’t know whether you give a Bertie’s booger-flavor bean about Pottermania, but I take offense at being banished by a quiz to a Podunk slum school like Verminbridge Prep where students are trained only to perform support roles such as laundering Quidditch uniforms or picking up dragon droppings in Hagrid’s corral. And the “houses” are definitely sub par. There is no fancy talking hat to sort out your fate; students are assigned based on their favorite cheese.
These are the unappetizing options:
HOUSE COLORS MASCOT
Slinkford Gray and Grey Weasel
Squeekin Mold and Puce Vole
Gutterpinge Peagreen and Moss Tree shrew
Sludgingworth Black and Smudge Fruit Bat
Chubling Yeast and Yellow Horned toad
Well, forget that stinking quiz. I intend to drop out and muggle my way through life without a wand.
P.S. My dear readers, my blog is now available on Kindle. Would you like to submit a review? Go here and tell the world what you think
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7 comments:
Too funny! I think I'd go without a wand, too. :)
Woo, that school sounds...monochromatic.
You need to take a different quiz! I'm a Hufflepuff. ;)
I think I would prefer the school of hard knocks to any of those! ;D
Gutterpinge sounds nice. I love peagreen and moss (although they might clash slightly).
Good for you for trying (as my mother always says each time I don't get accepted into the schools of my dreams, like all of those online psychic courses)
Sounds like a school for house elves. You would be a little too tall I think.
How cool that you're on Kindle! I will definitely go check it out (if I can figure out how, that is).
=)
PS. I think your decision to remain wandless is a good one, under the circumstances.
i think i might choose slinkford... i tend to like my gray/grey(s). kindle is BIG time! wow for you, and the world. they have no idea the treat they are in for :)
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