The Fine Art of Gift Giving

My dear readers,

It has come to my attention that most of you are extremely cheap frugal, which is oh so stylish this year.  When it comes to gift giving you like to avoid driving to the store and wandering around aimlessly while you could be watching your treasured tivoed episodes of So You Think You Can Dance and eating chocolate moose track ice cream straight out of the carton protect the world's resources.

As usual, I can offer you the miserly ideal solution because I, like you am trying to carve enough out of the grocery budget to sneak in a pedicure live more "simply".


When a gift giving occasion arises, why not scrounge around your house and yard utilize your current inventory.  Ordinary objects, if  accompanied with a notecard full of crap imbued with enough mystique will be sure to please the most  critical and whiny discerning giftee.

Because you are as steadfast as this

beautiful polished stone, please accept

it as a token of my respect 

 

This lovely leaf drifted

through the air

and reminded me

of the way your mind works 

You are still

beautiful

even though your

skin is getting 

a 

little crunchy

(For a potential love interest)

You

are soft,

you smell good

and  baby,

you are 

highly flammable

I 

am so empty

when you're

not around.