Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Sensei and Sensibility

When I was ten I was forced to pound a blubbery bully underneath the bleachers at a basketball game in Thatcher, Arizona.  I don't remember his offense, but it was obviously grevious because I had to be fuming with fury to muster enough power in my skinny snakelike arms to beat up anyone.  Fortunately, I had honed my pugilistic techniques by pounding and being pounded by my  brothers from the time we were toddlers.

Let us bow respectfully to some worthy examples of the ancient art of self defense.

 If Scarlett's oar doesn't kill you
the laser beams coming out her eyes will 

One day Grasshopper, you will learn 
to trim the hedges using only your hands...
like your big sister, Locust 

Renee administers a fatal kiss via lethal lipgloss
to her ancient enemy, Aunt Annabelle

Arturo's moves are all contained within this book...
now available on Amazon.   
Only $19.95: includes free throwing star 

Bobbi Bowie (David Bowie's mother)
has been stuck in this position since 1984

Skip Fronske demonstrates his highly effective pose
while pleaing for donations to Professors without Borders

Skippy indicates his desire to have shish kebabs for dinner

This is the postcard Gordon sends to his kids 
when they write home and ask for money

It was hard for Mom to tell which was the evil twin, 
since both of them liked kitties

Maryann suddenly realized who she had heard howling 
during the last full moon 
and reached for the silver bullet

All photos found here


Matthew Rush said...

Great fun!

Anonymous said...

Oh, Laraine. I can't imagine the busy little wheels spinning in your head!

Sue said...

All hilarious, but I liked George the best!


~Nicole Ducleroir~ said...

Hilarious post! And great use of alliteration throughout the opening paragraph of this post!

I followed you over her from Roni's blog. So glad I did! Your Mother's Day post had me in stitches!!

Looking forward to reading more :)

Emily Widdison said...

again a great laugh after a long long day. Thanks:)

Those pictures only make me wish I had taken karate as a child. I guess I can start now with my kids.

And happy 100 post!

Pondside said...

I think the fellow with the reddish beard and the professorial aura might live around here - very mild-mannered bus driver, actually. Who knew what he does in his off hours?!

Mr Monkey said...

very funny- I'm now a follower
Mr Monkey